February 1, 2008
My taxi crashed to a bus inside a tunnel somewhere in Makati.
The hood bended and the driver came out to see the extent of the damage.
I just looked at the fare meter, gave the driver sixty pesos, came out through the driver’s side door, and hailed another taxi.
At that very moment, I felt nothing. NOTHING! No pity for the poor driver, no fear the moment the taxi hit the bus, no relief and “thank-goodness-I-am-alive” feeling after the collision. No emotion, just this nagging feeling that I’ll be late. LATE for a damn appointment.
Thinking of it now, the incident might be GOD’s answer to my ardent plea of death minutes before the incident. Or maybe not. After another scolding and emotional spanking from eGoman (read: the boss), anger coursed throughout my body. Like electricity flowing through my veins. Hours later, on my way to Manila International Airport, trapped inside a bus that is also trapped in an eternal traffic, with my head filled with wrath, depression, and the nagging feeling that I will be late; I pleaded and vented to the Almighty why do I have to suffer those miseries. Why don’t He just let me die, right there and then.
Minutes later, my taxi crashed to bus.
Now I feel pity to the poor driver. What had happened to him? What would his company do to him? Questions that I don’t have the answers. Thoughts that will never help the driver.
Now I rediscovered that He indeed listens in a way that I wished.